


Hidden agendas

by starhitchhiker



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Possessive Behavior, Post TFA, Rating May Change, Science Fiction, Slow Build, Unhealthy Relationships, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-05-14 12:12:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5743396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starhitchhiker/pseuds/starhitchhiker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In this world, everybody is desperately searching for something - power, happiness, freedom- and there's even someone that just wants to be forgotten. But then again, when has that ever mattered?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a previous fanfiction, Unavoidable entaglement. No real need to read it, you'll get the story all the same.

The mathematician had been smoking like a chimney for the past two weeks and the entire room reeked so badly that almost no one was entering anymore, not even to clean it. As a consequence, the stench was steadily increasing. The ventilation system, even if specifically designed for an underground base bursting of activity, was not able to keep up with it.

Of course, there was the possibility of everything being a well orchestrated plan, mused General Organa, since the man was obviously unable to perform his assigned task but not as keen on admitting it. Three days prior, he had even asked to use their mainframe at its maximum possible performance, which put a stop to all the base's activities but the basic security systems.

It was all for nothing, since the beeping red light shown at that moment on the central heads-up display was indicating that the simulation did not converge to any significant result. The repetitive noise echoing in the large hall was starting to get on her nerves, but the man kept fumbling around anyway, pushing buttons on the keyboard with increasing frustration.

__Encryption specialist my ass._ _

"This has to stop. It's clearly useless and I can't leave my people in standby any longer. This is a military base, after all," She finally spoke, shaking her head while moving away from the wall against which she had been waiting for the last few hours.

The man's shock was clear since the fag almost fell off his lips and right onto his highly flammable polymeric trousers. He had probably thought of his employer as too senile to realize what was happening... Or he had simply forgot that she was present.

"General, I just need a bit more time. It's only a matter of varying the correct parameter to-"

"No. You have no idea of what you're doing and we can't afford to lose any more time." She was gentle, but firm. She might have been a princess by right of blood, born into that position - or adopted, at least - but her skills alone made her a fearful commander.

Her words seemed to have reached him, as he sighed, resigned. "It's not like you have someone better than me to hack this thing, you know," He bitterly added, starting to remove the test wires from the small, almost blackened chip on the breadboard.

Organa smiled, unfastening her comlink from the belt.

"As a matter of fact, I do. Captain, the experiment ends here," She communicated into the microphone, "Please, send someone to retrieve Hana. It's time to collect our favour."

* * *

It was a beautiful, sunny day. A pleasant change after almost a week of stormy clouds, thanks to which the water temperature had dropped several degrees, almost wreaking havoc on her terribly sensitive Jormakian seaweed farm.

There was still much to do before sundown if she wanted to have the first harvest in time for the next expedition, so when a small cargo ship landed on the only strip of land __not__ covered in sand, she frowned. The Resistance logo etched on the side panel left no doubt about the identity of her visitors, and Hana wasn't really sure if it was just a courtesy visit, or if it meant trouble. The latter, probably, since she had never really been lucky enough for the former.

As the hatch door started to open, she gathered all her nets, slowing climbing back up the hill. Finn was waiting for her at the top, the same jacket on his shoulder that he always wore and an alarmingly large manila folder in his hands.

"... Guess I just had my answer," She murmured.

"Sorry, what?"

"It's nothing. Hello Finn, how are you doing? Why did she send you here?" The woman grunted, annoyed.

He laughed, moving towards her for a hug, only to stop shortly after, taking notice of the large quantity of ridiculously big and painfully looking metallic hooks hanging from her jacket.

"Man, you certainly don't like to beat around the bush. Is there a place we can sit and talk? Do you realize I travelled almost one million parsec to come here, right?"

She grumbled something about where he could put his parsecs, but lead him, regardless, to a small stilt house that was connected to the solid ground by a rope bridge.

"It's not much, but it's home," She informed him after opening the fragile door, carefully laying the net on a piece of wooden framework. Her jacket hung by the entrance, she pointed at the only table in the room, where a solitary chair was.

Finn sat down at her gesture, taking in the small home while the woman moved towards the sink to wash her hands and face. The place was small, yes, but very cosy. The walls were painted a bright yellow colour, somehow shiny in the sunlight that came from the open windows. Beautiful seashells in pink, green and nacre were scattered all over, even glued on the headboard of the single bed, right now occupied by a ridiculously large amount of fluffy pillows. He tried hard not to laugh. Girls.

She was standing next to him just a moment later, brows knitted together and an inquisitive look on her face while she finished drying off her nape with a cloth. It was difficult to recognize the scarred, wounded girl brought to them seven months prior in the young woman now in front of him, her face heavily freckled by continuous exposure to sunlight and hair tucked haphazardly behind her ears. The hands on her hips were no more white and delicate but strengthened by manual work and covered in small scratches that the salty water kept red and irritated.

"Have you finished gawking?" She inquired, unable to retain a small smile from appearing on her lips.

"I'm sorry. It's just... You've changed a lot."

Her grin grew into a full blown smile as she lifted herself to sit on the table, her feet dangling from the edge.

"Yeah. Guess it's the 'norm when you suddenly become __free__. It happened to you too, I reckon."

Finn was quiet for a long moment, tapping with his finger on the folder in front of him, a vague look of shame on his face.

"Ah, I see. That's why they sent you," The smile disappeared as quick as it came. "The ex-First Order's disciple, who turned into a valuable asset for the Resistance instead of just flying away and living his fucking life as he prefers. The good example __all__ the traitors should follow," Hana spat, her voice bitter. The wet cloth landed heavily on the table, and Finn couldn't find the courage to rebuke while she moved away to stand at the large, lone window in the room.

When he broke the silence, he was talking quietly, almost apologetically, "You know, she would have never called you back if there were other possibilities."

She, Hana guessed, must have been Leia Organa.

"I'm a fisherman. What does she want from me? I'm not a pilot, not a fighter. Even before that, I was just a non-commissioned officer appointed to communication networks, not a..." Her voice drifted into nothing, her shoulders getting stiffer as realization dawned upon her.

When the woman looked back, the look in her eyes moved from suspicion to horror while taking in the small chip that Finn was holding between his thumb and forefinger.

"We got this almost by chance, and right now we are trying to descramble the signal. Another catastrophe like the Hosnian system must be avoided at all costs, especially now that all the remaining Senators are-"

"NO!" She interrupted him abruptly, making a savage gesture to shut him up, "I don't fucking care about your damned Republic! My life will be happy and complete if I don't ever see a uniform again - of whatever kind and side!"

Finn sighed, his mouth closing in straight, stern line. "You owe us one, Hana."

And with that, she knew she was doomed. Because it was true. Because she might have been a coward, but she was still honest.

The man must have seen her resolution dissolve from her expression under the irrefutable force of his truth, for he stood up from the chair and looked solemnly into her eyes. "We will leave tomorrow morning. In case you need to…" __Say goodbye__ _._ The unspoken words hung heavily in the air between them, filling her heart with dread.

She just nodded, a lump in her throat making her unable to speak.

Later, that evening, almost everything was ready. She had commissioned the closest neighbour to take care of her farm in change for all the proceeds, and that was pretty much all it took.

She gathered a small bag containing nearly all her belongings - save for the working tools - and, making sure the sturdy window shutters were closed tight, her little house was made as secure as it could be against the elements. When she leaned down on her bed, she buried her face among the pillows, breathing in the briny smell that permeated everything in the house with a strange, foreboding scent.

Oddly, she was asleep in seconds.

* * *

The quiet sound of the undertow was as close to heaven as she could think. Hana was sitting on the shore, bathed in darkness, gathering handful of smooth, greyish sand, letting it slide silently through her fingers. When tilted toward the light of the twin moons, fragment of seashells would shine dimly and paint imaginary constellations on her palm.

The nightly breeze was cool and damp, as always, and Hana would have been surprised of not feeling cold, clad only in her nightgown, had she not been aware of the dream-like quality of the scene. Her nets were nowhere to be seen, and a long line of pale, green lights were glimmering throughout the sea, drifting at the mercy of the waves.

 _ _Bioluminescent micro-organisms, usually only visible when both the satellites were in new moon phase__ \- meticulously provided her brain. It was completely against the rules of nature, to see such a sight, at the present time.

Still, it was one to behold. She stood up quickly, brushing the sand away from her legs and walking a few steps into the black water, crouching to submerge the hem of her gown up to her thighs. The little lights were now being carried towards the shore, gently touching her bare skin and staining the pale blue fabric a fluorescent green.

She laughed, delighted, and turned her back to the sea to show the result of her childish game at the man behind her…

An imposing figure clad in black stood on the bank, the broad expanse of his shoulders swallowing the stars in the sky, his face backlit and impossible to recognize.

Goosebumps rose on her skin as a buzzing, sparking sound broke the silence, forcing a scream out of her throat...

* * *

Hana woke up at the knocking on her door, forehead covered in a thin sheen of sweat.

"Rise and shine little flower!" Greeted Finn's voice, seeping in through the woodwork.

A beam of sunlight hit her face immediately afterwards, and she groaned, covering her eyes from the offending brightness.

"C'mon, get out of the bed! If you have your luggage ready, I'm going to carry it on the ship," He offered, letting himself in.

She was left with no choice but to kick away the blanket and begin getting ready, the frightful dream already vanishing from her mind.

Not even an hour later, Finn closed the cargo's hold door behind her, and she looked one last time at her blue and golden world, straightening her shoulders under a weight she hadn't felt in months.

Only the pilot - a young man with the sad, old eyes of a person whom had seen too much - seemed to understand her, smiling encouragingly in her direction.

"I'm sure it won't be that bad, lassie," He reassured in a thick accent, flipping the switches for the take-off.

Hana plopped down on a seat.

Nope. It will probably be worse.

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

The chip looked overall solid and well kept, but the small crackles at the top-right corner were seriously reducing any possibility of testing it without causing some major electrical disruption. Even a fully integrated one would probably not be enough for the realization of a counter-device, let alone one almost hit with a blaster shot - all the magnetic domains of its main memory polarized force knows how.

Those had been her thoughts for the last half-hour, at least, and Poe was starting to feel both amused and frustrated. Hana had almost not blinked for the entire time, eyes fixed on the small, plastic device she was keeping in front of her face with some rubber-coated tweezers, totally oblivious of her guest. After the enthusiastic hug she had welcomed him with the night before, he couldn't help but feel a little neglected.

"So, what's the prognosis, doctor?"

The young woman jumped at that, almost losing her hold on the chip, and shooting him a warning glare. "I'll need more than three of these. As I told you yesterday, the best option is still to steal a fully-functional descrambler from somebody, at least if you want to stay in that ridiculous time slot."

"What? Weren't you the top specialist in the enemy's comm systems?"

She chuckled, setting everything back down on her workbench. "If by that you mean that I'm the only one, then yes. Yes, of course."

He fell down on the chair beside her, sighing. "It's not that easy. What should we do, start a war, then run around the battlefield and loot stormtroopers for helmets? Fondle them a bit and squeeze their pockets?"

She closed the screened box in which she had placed all the enemy devices, just in case somebody had actually realized what the Resistance was doing and added a clever tracking system to some of the key-pieces.

She still couldn't believe the naivety and amateurism of their previous employee - obviously guilty of lack of common sense and technical skills at the same time; connecting a stolen communication device to a enemy mainframe is the kind of error that may very well be your last one.

"That's your job, not mine. I can add these three scramblers to your comlinks now, but then they will work both ways; you'll hear them and they will hear you. The moment you switch it on, they'll know you're there."

He closed his mouth with an audible click.

The possibility was unsettling enough to kill the conversation, so they just sat in amicable silence for a few minutes, looking at the landing field that was burning up under the red light of the dusk, where the shadows of the few ships parked outside were lengthening slowly on the newly tarred surface.

D'Qar was a luscious, beautiful planet, even after being subject to the First Order's carpet bombing that wiped out forests and buildings that left it with wide, angry gashes. They had known it was coming and nobody had actually been there at the time; still cheerful for the destruction of the Starkiller base, the had flown away to avoid the obvious counterattack that annihilated all of the Resistance structures remaining on the planet. Everybody had come back, later - for the adage says that lightning never strikes the same place twice.

On her part, Hana was pretty sure that elementary physics states otherwise, but she wasn't going to put a damper on everybody's serenity. She was still adapting to a life where the freedom of thinking was an inalienable right, and the happiness provided by liberty helped her relate with the rest of the Resistance crew.

She had gone away, of course. Not on her native planet - it was, after all, the most obvious choice if somebody was sent to find her - but a similar one, where the bright sunlight had been able to erase all her negative feelings.

Now, seven months after her rescue from the Finalizer, she was back in the eye of the storm. The night before, curled-up in the bunker bed placed temporarily next to Poe, she had felt a freezing uneasiness when dark dreams of violence and fear had crept up on her, and she had woken up with a shout and in a cold sweat.

Poe must have followed her train of thoughts, since he grimaced, asked, "Want me to sleep with you again tonight?" He then ducked quickly to avoid a quite heavy-looking electrical coil thrown in his general direction.

"I'm not a baby anymore, I can sleep alone. I'm used to that kind of nightmare, anyway," She lied.

"Alright, then I'll go report to General Organa about your progress. Just try not to forget dinner, as I _know_ you did yesterday."

He took one look at her, walking out of the laboratory.

Hana sighed, resigned, and went back to her fruitless tasks.

* * *

 

General Organa was sitting in a large, comfy, stuffed chair, trying desperately to stay awake through the never ending line of reports about unsuccessful recon missions. The chair was a new thing, and while her back was immensely grateful, it did more harm than good since her concentration seemed to start wavering more often now that she wasn't forced to stand all day long.

There had been a lot of small changes in the last months. People tiptoed around certain topics when she was present, which in her opinion was understandable, yes, but still annoying.

Patricide is an unpleasant subject, but the possibility that conceivably important informations are kept secret just to spare some grief is even more dreadful, in her mind.

When Poe Dameron entered the room, the croaking buzz that was admiral Ackbar speech ended abruptly, all the attention monopolized by the revered pilot.

"I just got back from the research centre. Hana says she needs more samples, if we don't want to jeopardize the backup plan," He stated.

A young, blonde official snorted ungracefully. "That is _not_ a backup plan, it's a suicide mission. We have already discussed it and it's ridiculous. Can't she just try it out and see what happens? Maybe we'll be lucky."

"That is your strategy? Being lucky?"

"We have no time to waste! If the informations we gathered are true…", Started Nunb, being quickly interrupted by Ackbar.

"What if they're not? What if it's a trap?"

"A trap - yes, that's a good point. We shouldn't forget that your golden girl is a First Order deserter. Maybe she's trying to fool us too! Acting by her terms on the basis of that signal..." The blond insisted, moving forward as he tried to impose on his opinion by physically imposing himself.

Leia sighed, rising from her seat and setting her face to a scowl. "Stop it. That is classified information and you will _not_ divulge it now," The general snapped with a brusqueness meant to remind everybody of the hot blooded princess she once had been. Leia brushed a stray hair away from her face, looking pointedly at the group of low rank pilots from the just-returned blue squad, whom were overly excited by the idea of gaining such an insight on their superior's plans. "Is it possible to provide the girl the required technology?" She asked simply.

Poe shrugged, uncertainty written all over his face. "We can try the black market. There's always hordes of scavengers and raiders after a battle, maybe something is still around."

Organa nodded, dismissing the subject with a wave. "Then I'll see about it. Now, if you will excuse me..." She promptly left the room.

Seven months. That was the last time they sighted one of the First Order's leaders, right after the destruction of the Finalizer and the massive counter attack that razed their decoy planet, and then occurred many long days of nothing. Not a rumour spread in the ether about their location or activity, despite the grid search on all the imaginable frequencies, and even with the insights about their systems of communication, not a word was heard.

Somebody was starting to talk about how the Order was mortally wounded by their attacks, the few survivors going into hiding like rats. Hope was blooming in everybody's hearts, a treacherous flower bringing the seed of destruction within itself.

Letting their guard down was foolish. Kylo Ren and his even more dangerous master were still somewhere - she could _feel it_ in her bones, them gathering their forces to strike down the new, budding attempt to rebuilt the Parliament for the third time in a row.

That had to be avoided at all costs, even if the price to pay was taking the risk of following some nebulous vision provided by the trainee of an almost dead and forgotten Order.

And, _force_ , was she willing to pay it, even with her own life, just to have a remote chance to…

The door of the parlour opened automatically in front of her, bathing the woman in much more flattering natural light after the yellow lamps of the corridors.

If only she could have Han or Luke with her, she was still thinking, unsure.

"Leia!" Came the feminine voice from the inside.

Rey had grown a lot in the time spent on Ahch-To, even if just mentally. She still looked like the little, dirty scavenger girl from Jakku, while at the same time exuding quietness and self-confidence in warm waves.

Her desert clothes had been dismissed in favour of a more traditional Jedi attire, comprised of a long, hooded robe and a high belt from which the old Anakin's lightsaber was hanging in its leather straps.

Leia moved forward quickly, clasping the girl's hands in an affectionate welcome. "Rey... It's good to see you," She smiled, "And it's been a long time. How are you and my brother doing?"

"We're doing just fine. He is very good at hiding all the headaches I'm causing him," Rey laughed, disentangling herself from the woman. Still a bit shy to be touched, it looked like.

"Then why has he not come here with you? We were all surprised by it."

Despite the attempt to hide it, the girl must have sensed the General's apprehension, for she looked inquiringly in her eyes before knitting her eyebrows together. Rey took a long moment before answering, as if searching for the correct words.

"I understand why you would have preferred to have him here. But your message, last month, caused serious concerns for so many reasons. Luke and I talked a lot after that... Deciding on the action plan." she explained, walking slowly towards the window.

Leia followed her, ignoring the sight of the sunset in favour of keeping her attention on the young padawan.

"There were... Visions," Rey continued, subconsciously worrying the handle of her lightsaber, "When I was sleeping - sometimes even when I was meditating. We thought I was making up stuff, or picking up thoughts and images from people in other places - I'm very good at that, after all. Then we received your communication, and it was just like something I saw few weeks earlier."

The General arched one eyebrow, her lips stretched to a thin, incredulous line. "You're trying to tell me that you see the future?"

"I don't know - __we__ don't know what I saw," Rey rebuked, "But Master Luke thinks it's some sort of trial, made specifically for me. Like the Force is trying to tell me to act, to change things... It's all so mysterious, sometimes!"

Leia flinched at the open frustration in the girl's words, all her maternal instincts in ferment. It's not like there's someone better to act upon them. "I'm so sorry, Rey. I really want to help you if I can," She soothed, gently.

"Actually, you can," It was an unexpectedly direct answer, "But first, I need to explain you in more detail. What about sitting down for a bit to chat? I'm afraid it will be a lengthy discussion."

Leia couldn't explain why she felt like falling down in the rabbit hole.

* * *

 

Hana was sitting in the mess hall, fiddling with a rather thick and unsavoury stew.

Soldier's slop was the same everywhere, and she felt surprisingly like being on the Finalizer again. Only, this time the cacophony was extended to the colors too - no black and white uniforms in sight, but a bunch of people dressed in all the possible shades of the rainbow.

Finn and Poe had found her a few minutes before and were now sitting in front of her, looking quite amused from how she had just shredded a totally innocent plastic knife that had the bad luck to end up in her hands while she was frustrated.

"Jeez, you should calm down. I'm sure the cutlery didn't do anything to deserve that," Joked Finn, somehow able to talk around the humongous piece of bread he had stuffed in his mouth.

"Yeah, well, everyone in this room is looking at me like I'm some kind of savage or a weird animal. It's not exactly conducive to a pleasant dinner," She answered, trying to gulp down the stew.

"You do look like a savage. I'm wondering myself what happened to that cute girl I brought back here. She didn't had hands suitable for smashing plastic," Intervened Poe, glancing at a young blond man who was moving the chair next to him to sit down.

"Well, I had my manicure done twice a week, before."

"What? That's a lot!" The pilot laughed.

She just shrugged, a smirk on her lips. "Yeah, but you know... The beautician was a really cute guy with the most gorgeous smile and dimples. And girls have to work hard to get what they want! I needed almost two months to have him following me in the locker room..."

"Wha..? You naughty-"

"Then Hux comes out, no shirt on, and I realize pretty boy is as gay as it gets. He was drooling like an hungry Rancor!" She finished, deliberately ignoring the interruption.

Poe almost suffocated in his glass of water while Finn sputtered.

The girl next to her - Hana was pretty sure her name was Jessica - looked up, half amused. "Guess that's a good reason to stop seeing him."

"What? Are you crazy?" She feigned shock, "I never stopped. He still made me have the smoothest hands on the whole starship."

The three of them roared with laughter while Hana, a smug expression on her face, finished the insipid dinner. Only the blond guy was still looking at her.

"I'm sure that's important when your main job is to handle dicks," He finally commented.

And in the few seconds after that, hell broke loose.

Both blondie and Poe jumped on their feet, chairs overturned and trays falling on the floor. Finn was shocked into silence and Jessica yanked Hana behind her. The whole room fell silent, anticipation making the air heavy. There was a predatory gleam in most people's eyes, like beasts smelling blood. Hana didn't need mind reading skills to understand whose side most of the rebels were. Traitor once, traitor all along, it seemed. She sighed, aware that the situation had been building since her arrival on D'Qar.

"What's happening here?" Leia Organa was standing at the doorstep, looking quite angry.

"Did I just walked into you two having a fight? __Again__?" She asked, stomping towards them, "Poe? Jonah?" She pressed, her gaze shifting from the pilot to the blond idiot.

They had the good grace to look vaguely ashamed, like kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

"I'm sorry, ma'am." "I apologize, sir," They mumbled simultaneously, heads bowed down making them unable to see what initially made Finn squeal like a girl just a few seconds after.

"Rey!"

That must have been the young woman at the entrance of the mess hall, Hana assumed, with the brown hair tied in a bun and heavy robes that looked like nothing she had seen before on the base. It was her appearance, more than the presence of the General, that changed the mood of the whole room.

It was an extremely curious reaction. Half of the people cautiously left - looking quite afraid of her and even leaving their trays on the tables - while the other half moved forward to greet her.

Well, as soon as Finn would release her from the hug he had trapped her in, that is.

"But when did you..."

"Last month! I couldn't believe that you were..."

"I know. Oh, Finn, I was afraid that you.."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous! I was so happy to hear of what you did..."

"It would have never happened without you!"

It was the weirdest conversation Hana ever listened to.

"That's Rey. Looks like she's back from Luke Skywalker's planet," Jess provided the missing information.

Hana was stunned. Her gaze moved from the pretty face to the girl's side, where a lightsaber handle was glinting in the artificial light, and then frowned. "You mean.. She's a Jedi Knight?" she asked, sheepishly.

"More like padawan, I think. A trainee. But she's pretty good... I heard she fought against Ren on the Starkiller."

"Wha..?! She's the one that _scarred_ him?" Her voice was becoming decidedly high-pitched, making Poe chuckle.

"Of course. What's that, Hana? You look starstruck," He teased.

Rey choose that particular moment to stop shaking hands and looked directly towards the only woman in the room that she had never seen before. Her dazzling smile was enough to make Hana feel like a beetle pinned on a wall.

"...I think I have a girl crush," She announced, and even Leia couldn't help but ungracefully suffocate a laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter, the First Order is back, along with our favourite masked villain.  
> Space nazis, yay!


	3. Chapter 3

Hux shivered discretely, shifting his weight from one feet to the other.

The laboratory was cold even for him, perfectly used to the low temperatures typical of all the starships, and he was starting to wonder when Kylo Ren would decide to move from his position and finally let both of them go back to the main bridge.

He didn’t spoke, though. If he felt a sort of reverential fear from the sight in front of him, he could only imagine what kind of emotions the latter elicited from the Knight.

Instead, his eyes were intent on following around the lab staff; out of over twenty members of the original team, only three were still remaining, more than enough to keep an eye on the last steps of their ambitious project, and all of them now fussing around with datapads and big words, obviously trying to impress their guests.

They were chosen on the basis of more than their scientific curiosity: main required points had been extremely high technical abilities -of course, a conspicuous lack of the moral issues normal people is plagued with, and a ridiculously high disinterest for the world outside of their laboratory.

All the other people they started with, instead, had been... Removed from duty with an simple and efficient shot in their head.

It’s not like they could have left them go around with that kind of insights - he mused, 

“Status report?”

It was one of the scientist, a young woman with frizzy hairs and a crooked nose to answer, getting closer, together with the droid she was dictating notes to.

“Everything is proceeding as it should, sir. The perfluorocarbon oxygen regeneration is constant and no anomalies have been discovered in the subject during the accelerated growth process. Cleaning the genetic pool has been a difficult process, but this time we are 97% sure to be correct.” She informed them, keeping her eyes fixed on the large axolotlian tank in front of them “It’s a thing of beauty, isn’t it?” 

“She,” Ren corrected her, and not even his helmet could completely conceal how breathless he sounded.

“I’m sorry?” She looked surprised and more than a little scared by the interruption, while the droid beeped questioningly.

“It’s a  _she_ ,” He repeated, turning the head towards his interlocutor.

Kylo Ren’s shoulders we re hunched forward and it was difficult to decide if he felt somehow defeated or he was just ready to propel himself towards his victim. The harsh light coming from the machinery was using the man to paint a frightful shadow on the white, sterile floor, and each and every movement of the Knight was multiplied on it. 

If there was something that Hux had learn in the few years spent with this particular force-wielder, was when to step in to avoid a potential catastrophe.

“We are both extremely impressed by your work,” The general started, his lips curling into a not totally pleasant smile “It was time, after all, for success. I’m sure Lord Ren is tired to take care of the failures.”

A praise and a censure, for subordinates should never forget that there’s a fist inside the glove, he considered silently.

The woman correctly interpreted his words as a dismissal, and rushed away after a small bow, probably aware of having just barely escaped some incomprehensible rage outburst.

Ren’s voice was icy when, a few seconds later, he finally started to move towards the door. “That was unnecessary, general. You should remember that I’m not under your command, and I do not take kindly when people overstep their boundaries with me.”

Hux followed him, forced to lengthen his stride to keep up with the other man, his nostrils flared with disdain at the offensive words of his companion, to the point that even his voice was more petulant than usual.

“And  _you_ should remember that this whole project is under my responsibility. I don’t like your meddling with the staff. It usually ends up disastrously.”

If the knight actually caught his taunting he couldn’t say, for the masked man didn’t deigned to answer and just kept leading the way towards the bridge.

He knew he had sounded petty, and pettiness doesn’t suit high officials - or kids above fifteen - but for sure he couldn’t let the knight’s impulsiveness put his plan on risk, especially when so close to the end. 

It had been a First Order squadron to sift trough the ruins on planet Kamino, retrieving what possible. His men had worked night and day, for months, to rebuilt from scratch such an advanced technology without external aid, and  _no one_ was authorized to fuck up at this point, no matter how important their contribution might have been.

“Your staff is incompetent.”

The automatic door in front of them opened up at that precise moment, allowing plain view of the control room, where busy officers in neat uniforms were even more neatly performing their business. It was a sight that made the general’s heart swell with pride and he couldn’t realistically let Ren’s words unanswered.

“Lord Ren, my men are perfectly trained for their job. If you hadn’t been so insistent upon secrecy, we could have just asked another factory to perform this task in half the time it required us to. I’m sure that under proper control, and given the right amount of money...”

The Knight interrupted him with a brusque hand gesture. 

“Do you even realize the full impact of what we are doing here, general?” the voice, muffled and distorted by the helmet’s modulator, was icy. Ren stepped closer, invading the other man’s personal space with his imposing figure, and lowering his tone to a deadly murmur “There is always a leakage of information when so many people are working together. It happened to Vader with the Dead Star, it happened to you with the Starkiller. Do you  _never_ learn from the past?”

The ginger man swallowed anxiously when a gloved hand brushed his jaw on the way to his throat. He was pretty sure the masked monster in front of him wouldn’t dare to hurt him physically - especially in front of his troops, but the trips to the scientific bay never failed to unsettle the already volatile temper of Lord Ren.

With regrettable consequences for somebody, usually.

Hux collected his wits, frowning, and working hard to keep is voice firm. “Remove yourself from my person, Kylo Ren.”

That simple phrase seemed to have the desired effect, for the Knight stepped back immediately. Now, if he could only see what kind of emotion were showing under that dreadful mask it would be even easier to know how to deal with the situation...

_Dammit_.

“I personally think that you overdid your job then, Ren. Still no one has come here to try stop us. What if they didn’t found out the small clues you left them?” Hux retaliated. “What if they are unable to find us, here? I’m starting to wonder if you haven’t just overrated our adversaries. Or maybe that’s what you really want, deep down?” The general smiled knowingly. ”It would be understandable, it’s genetic. Not even you can completely escape all the bindings that tie the calf to the cow.”

It was like pushing on a switch: Ren went completely still for a second, before storming out of the room with a growl of outrage.

Hux was still smiling, even if completely aware that his words were going to cost him some ridiculously expensive piece of the ship. But underlining who was the highest authority on the ship was always worth. Equilibrium had been re-established. 

 

Kylo Ren, on his part, was scurrying along the corridor at the maximum speed allowed by dignity, glad for his infamous temper since it translated into a trip with no interruption from the base personnel.

Once in his chambers, he pounded in the locking code for the door and headed directly towards the bed, where the mask fell off with a muffled thud.

_Breath in, breath out._  

He felt like his lungs were on fire, his heart beating wildly against the ribcage while he paced around, trying to calm down. 

That bastard. That stupid, blind, and overconfident bastard; how dare he speak like that in front of him?

He new that Hux’s words were just the tip of the iceberg, the real problem well hidden under those black, bottomless waters. From the moment he had laid eyes on the body floating inside the tank in the lab, he had to suppress the urge of retching. 

It was perfect, like a personification of his nightmares.

He had felt both terror and relief knowing that, at least this time, there would be no need to push the button meant to inject a lethal dose of potassium chloride in the slowly forming clone, ending up with a wet , too familiar, corpse he was supposed to deal with by himself.

_Shell_. Not a corpse -he tried to himself: just a void, emotionless shell with no kind of self-knowledge.

When he headed to the adjoining bathroom to wash his sweat-covered face, the scarred man staring back to him from the mirror looked haunted, hair stuck on his forehead and dark circles around his eyes. 

_Shell_. Only that. 

It was a thought which never failed to bring him some measure of comfort, and his breathing eased, slowly, to a normal pace. He still had a few weeks before ordering the medical staff to start the awakening procedure and voluntarily throw himself down the hell hole that the plan was.

He freed himself from the majority of his constricting clothes, leaving them on the floor before padding and laying down on the light, sterile-white duvet that covered his bed. The fabric was soft on his skin, and he barely had time to roll beneath the blanket before starting to drift off to sleep, fiscally and mentally exhausted.

Shell. The well-trained mental reflexes were already starting to work, pushing away the horror that the word now evoked in him, and substituting it with a safer image - a shameful skill from a long forgotten past, one that he would never use when fully conscious, but still useful for the moments in which the sleep eluded him and self-preservation kicked in.

Shell. Well, _shells_ is even better, his mind provided him.

Many of them, all mother of pearl, in all the colours of the rainbow - his thoughts were getting foggier while his mind slowly slipped on the higher levels of the existence, were the universe was filled with entire galaxies made of countless fragments of light. Not suns, no, not even if some of them were just as shining: somebody, once, had told him that it was a pretty common way of seeing other people’s mind but he had never cared for the technicality: he had been struck by the sight that first time, by the sense of connection it had felt towards the entire world in those few precious first moments. 

Even after all that time and all the horror he had witnessed, he couldn’t thing of any other word but  _wonderful_.

Not many were able to reach that place voluntarily, but almost all the dreamers were there, floating around unable to remember the beauty of it, once awaken again. 

Drowsily, in the material world, he let a hand stroke his naked chest, starting from his once wounded side and then up to the other arm, where the was hand resting beneath the pillow.

He could almost see someone else caress his skin, a feather-light touch and a soft cooing that spoke about being cared for, being held by another human being and many other secret desires he though he crushed a long, long time ago.

Now, his mind was providing him the equivalent of a slow walk through the void, strolling around the directionless space in search of something.

He inhaled deeply, letting tendrils of Force creep around and probe the void. If he was very lucky, maybe he would catch a certain dream in that blackness, : that dream -he knew- would have soft sand, wind, and an entire house built of seashells; it would be quiet and comforting, maybe capable of soothing even his restless mind.

In the end, the wind was actually in the dream, but it was bringing acrid smell of smoke and sulfur to maul his eyes and nostrils, while the low dunes of dust of the black desert were nothing if not an indication of impending nightmares.

Somehow, he thought that it was exactly what he deserved.

* * *

 

On a far away planet, Rey was still concentrated on her task well past bedtime, eyes glued on the screen of the holopad hastily mounted on a support, switching contacts on the testing bench with a logic that up to that moment still eluded everybody else.

Finn was the only one still awake other that her, perched on a stool and bored to death.

“How’s that she has a name and not a number?” Rey asked abruptly.

Apparently, Finn didn’t need any other information to understand his friend’s question, for he yawned and answered.

“Non-commissioned officers are not as replaceable as troopers.”

The young jedi looked quickly in the direction of Hana, asleep in a chair with her head supported by the back wall and her legs propped up on a table; with her short hair streaked blond by the sunlight, chipped lips and a cute set of freckles didn’t fit with the image of a black dressed official in a sterile control room, ready to destroy some planet. 

“Was she good?” She tried again, but her friend just shrugged.

The day before, the woman had officially throw in the towel with the decryption attempts, refusing any kind of bruteforcing methods and hurling a surprisingly creative series of abuses in perfect Mando’a.

“Give me weeks and I’ll do it, but with the allowed time slot... I found two of the three keys, and look how much time it needed! I’m pretty sure that these bastards ain’t even using the Basic alphabet, but some crazy 5000 plus characters’ one, like the Ugnaughtian o something,” She had lamented, smirking knowingly when asked about how she got that information. “That’s what I would do.”

The only option left was more physical and far more risky in terms of system damage: trying to bypass the control by short circuiting the correct contacts without burning everything down to a crisp.

Rey was chosen for the task, ideally for her sharp sense of intuition when facing new and strange machineries, practically because she was the only one safe enough from the creative punishments that the General was used to order when particularly pissed off.

At the last body count, of the three original communication chips plus nine others obtained by even more illicit ways, only two had survived the testing procedures and she was pretty sure that this one now under her supervision was rapidly approaching its end.

So, it was with a certain degree of surprise that she saw the output signal suddenly decrypted on screen, and she blinked a couple of time just to make sure she was actually awake.

“Ohi, you two! I think I did it!” Rey all but squealed, a huge smile splitting her face in half.

Finn was the quickest one, reaching her side in mere seconds, followed by a still drowsy Hana.

“Wha..? You did? Let me see!” The woman intervened, squashing herself in the small space left between the two friends. They all stayed there for a while, staring in awe at the perfectly clear series of sinusoids wavering on the monitor.

“We must call Leia.” Finn decided, moving quickly towards the door.

“Finn,” Hana intervened, stopping him mid-step “try to avoid too much public. It’s better if first decide with the General what kind of action we’ll proceed with.” suggested.

The young man flashed a brilliant smile. “Don’t worry, I’ve got it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New job, new apartment, definitely less time in case you were wondering.  
> No more beta reader too and I still kinda suck at english.
> 
> Oh well.


	4. Chapter 4

A couple of hours later, the room was full of people Hana knew just by name: there was General Organa, of course, right in front of the workbench and right now chatting with Rey, then a long series of unfamiliar faces with lots of military insignia on their jackets.

Most of them were stealing glances to the pink elephant in the room, standing in a corner and trying to develop invisibility properties: her.

“How long does it take to have the comlinks updated and functioning?” Poe was asking, standing right beside the General, the palm of both hands firmly placed on the table.

“I can do that even for tomorrow. But organizing the attack squads...” The Jedi started, immediately interrupted by Ackbar.

“Those will not be a problem. As soon as we identify their precise location, we can send them.”

“Marila?” Leia eyed a young official, standing in the back with an hand on the headpiece she was spoking softly to.

“The heat trace from the The Core is still the more probable track. The emission spectrum denotes an artificial origin and it’s still emitting on the same wavelengths of the old First Order’s admiral ship but... “ she went silent for a long moment, apparently listening to a voice in the earpiece “ no. The only electromagnetic signature present is too distorted for a vessel. It might just be some burning piece of junk.”

“Have you tried reconstruct it back with an asteroid field model?” Poe asked, frowning.

Marila just shrugged. “There are no asteroid fields in The Core, commander”

The next voice to intervene caused everyone to turn. “Oh, c’mon.”

Hana looked quite disconcerted, moving her eyes from an inquisitive face to another. “If you really don’t have asteroid fields in The Core region, you need a map update. Like, badly.”

And while an expression of mild shock found her way to almost everybody as soon as the conscience of the recent event downed on one person after another, like an oil leakage, Leia Organa just closed her eyes ad breathed deeply.

“Everything runs in circles.”

* * *

“A Resurgent-class Star Destroyer, the Finalizer’s exact twin.” the little blonde bitch was explaining, her pretty face all scrunched up in an expression of mild disgust.

She wasn’t even trying to fake sympathy for the Resistance, too busy to make everyone notice how she wasn’t supposed to be there, helping them out.

He wondered, how could nobody notice that?

“Choosing to hide there... It’s clever, nobody would think to search them in there. The fact they weren’t able to disguise completely their signal might mean the ship wasn’t completed when they moved on it -that’s probably why they’re hiding, it’s stilla work in progress...” she kept explaining. Noisy _and_ bitchy.

“You really thrive in our misery, don’t you?” he asked a soft voice, dripping with venom.

“You really thrive in our misery, don’t you?” asked a soft voice, dripping with venom. Jonah was leaning quietly against the window, arms crossed in front of his chest and features obscured against the daylight. But he was looking right to her, full lips bended in a ferocious sneer. “Why shouldn’t you, after all? You were still with them when Starkiller fired, isn’t it? We lost many of ours that day and still you dare to judge us just because we are trying to forget-“

“She doesn’t, J”, Poe intervened “She was only saying that-“

“You should stop defending her! Always treating them like she’s one of our comrades – she’s not. The bitch was on that fucking bridge that day, pushing the button that wiped away an entire system, and you still shut me out like I’m trying to lead a lamb to the slaughterhouse” Jonah’s eyes were burning with hate, fist closed menacingly “You may think whatever you want, but I’m not going to let a goddamn aspid worm his way among people I care for!”

“Jonah!” Leia’s voice boomed and it was enough to impose silence in the room again. “This is not the time to discuss such matter. She’s here because I called her myself: now go take a walk and try to cool down, I won’t have my Blue Leader lose his temper this way.”

He obliged with an annoyed grunt, taking care of brushing against Hana’s shoulder while moving towards the door. “Watch your back, bitch”, was the murmured goodbye.

She paled and squirmed uncomfortably, her mouth stretched in a thin line. The people in the room, however, didn’t stop stealing glances; if initially they had only been uncomfortable, some of them was now openly hostile, being remembered darker times and lost ones.

Leia sighed, leaning tiredly against the table. “There is no excuse for us, for trying to forget. It might make it easier to go on, but only the memory of what happened can help us to avoid a repeat of those tragic events”, she spoke quietly, the look in her eyes showing openly what burden weighted on her thin shoulders. “What they are doing, hiding in such an unabashed matter, is a slap to all we fight for. If they count to use our shame to their advantage, we must prove them wrong. We must show that we are not afraid to confront our errors.”

* * *

The whole base was bursting with activities.

It must have been the fifth time he had heard his name called, Poe thought, relishing in the small amount of privacy provided by the durasteel panels used to separate the landing field from the spare parts stock area. He was sitting carelessly on an ammunition box, already dressed up in his pilot gear, helmet discarded on one side while the hurried steps of pilots and mechanics were echoing on the other side.

Beside him, the girl dressed in a similar suite was messing with her already tousled blonde hair, silent from.. well, definitely too long.

“You won’t intervene.” He tried, speaking softly. “ I don’t know why she insisted so much, you already did your part. It’s not like we really need any more support, the plan is easy enough.”

“It’s not that” she answered quietly, sighing while lifting her head to look at him dead in the eye. “You know, I’ve never had a family. You all are the closest thing to it, and if somethings happens…”

“I know” he was serious, his usual roguish smile abandoned in favor of a more somber look.

“And I don’t want to see a First Order cruiser again, I don’t want to go back. I’m trying _so_ hard to forget that life”, she kept talking.

“I know”

“And I’m afraid. Of what might happen to them, to you. I'm- I'm afraid of _him_.” Her voice was slowly breaking while she tried to suffocate a sob. “I love you”

He smiled, knowingly. “I know”, answered, and then chuckled at her startled expression, moving a gloved hand to tuck away a stray lock of hair from her face. “You’re not half as subtle as you think you are, Hana.”

Her face went hard in a moment while she recoiled from his touch. “Well, that’s a pretty fucked up answer to a confession, you know?” she lamented, jumping on her feet like a charged coil and gaining a few steps of distance from him. When only silence followed, she snorted and turned her back to the pilot, hands shooting up to press the palm heels on her eyes. She wasn’t going to cry – she decided, not when everybody needed to be focused on the mission.

“It’s getting late and we still work to do before departure. Maybe we should go”

“Hana…”

“Just go, ok Poe? And see if you can persuade Ray to leave home that piece of junk she insist on flying with”

His voice sounded amused when he answered “I’ll try tell her that, but we both know she won’t listen. She ain’t the sweet pie she might look like. And besides, the piece of junk made the Kessel Run in- ”

“It might be quick”, she interrupted him brusquely “but it still belongs to a trash compactor”.

To that, he could not rebuke.

When she finally succeeded in swallowing the lump in her throat he was still there, brows knitted and watching here with worried expression.

“What!” she lamented again, rubbing the palm of the gloves on her trousers to dry away the tears never spilled.

He was gracious enough not to comment the puffiness of her eyes nor her red nose, but not enough not to stop after a few steps away, turning again towards her and starting awkwardly “Hana, about that thing you said a moment ago...”.

“Don't” she replied instantly “That's a discussion for another time. If after this mission we'll all be still alive, than... than maybe I'll find the courage to listen to your refusal”.

* * *

 

Up to that moment, the mission had been a success: the reconnaissance drones had confirmed the target position exactly were expected, and the four light cruisers -almost the complete Resistance battle force remaining had exited hyperspace at safety distance.

With the magnetic screen on to protect them from First Order scanners, the short range communication to advance behind cover had come at the expected time. “Do not let them see you until the X-Wing squadrons' leaders communicate the start of the attack. Keep your position secret for as long as possible, maintain radio silence and wait for the order of firing” had informed the slightly distorted voice of General Organa.

_ It can't be that easy,  _ was Hana's painfully repetitive thought. She had been dispatched onto a support ship with all the medical personnel and the Blue Squad as backup defense, with the order of staying as far as possible within the communication range.

Somewhere, she kept thinking, somewhere Poe and Finn and Rey where preparing to secretly board the First Order cruiser, waiting for the cover provided by the attack.

Somewhere, not far enough – but the whole universe was not far enough! - he was waiting, maybe aware of some disturbance, maybe scanning the infinity of void around him with little tendrils of a power that she could not fathom.

She had felt an increasing uneasiness slowly dribble inside her bones, one drop at the time, for all the time she had spent on the seat, unwilling to remove the seatbelts in fear of being unable to stop herself from bolting out of the ship. Now the uneasiness had blown into full panic.

“Something bad will happen.” she blurted.

The first medic -a handsome man close to the fifties and sitting right beside her, had opted for the kind of reassuringly smile it's usually reserved to fearful kids or anxious mothers. “You're just afraid, it's normal. Why don't we try this exercise: breath with me, deeeeeeply”.

She was just about to explain him very graphically what he could do instead of bother her, when the anatomically impossible suggestion was cut out by a bright explosion on the zoomed screen.  
“Wha- the attack already started?”

The first pilot quickly zoomed back, tracking system clearly showing the moving X-Wing shooting towards the enemy cruiser.

“Why was there not communication? Zora?”

The second pilot went rigid in his seat, clutching with the free hand at the headpiece.

“I don’t understand, communications are down but there’s no anomaly on the devices. It’s almost as somebody is disturbing the signal by purpose, but that would mean…”, he started. And never ended the sentence.

All lights went off suddenly, bathing the bridge in the total blackness of outer space. For almost ten second only an eerie silence enveloped them, then, somewhere in the bowels of the ship, a small generator went on and blueish emergency lamps took life.

It was – terror. Nothing but pure horror was painted on the faces of the crew, while the truth slowly downed on them. They had been baited.

“We’ve… freaking Ackbar was right!” the pilot shouted, trying hopelessly to restore power to the ship while the rest of the crew busted in action. “General! General Organa, can you hear me?” “No way, all lines are off – not even the radar system works anymore. It’s an attack on all sides”

“Navigation system is down”

“Life system thirty percent!”

Hana was the only one staying still at that point, a full body shiver finding its way towards her backbone.

_He knew_ . She had been right. There was no other answer to that – a wave of nausea threated to overwhelm her, while all her will was focused on keeping her mind in check. He knew, and everybody she cared for – Poe, that little jedi girl – was driving light speed inside the mouth of the beast.

She wasn’t even fully aware of the situation when she unbuckled the belts and started to run, leather boots thumping heavily on the floor on her way towards the armory: nobody tried to stop her, not even when she marched to the weapon stand and retrieved a blaster, checking it briefly, with expert hands, before heading to the barracks.

A shot was all it took for the selected door to open up: Jonah was flattened against a wall, his eyes gleaming with hatred and fear when she walked through the threshold.

“I KNEW it was coming – you bitch, did you..”  
“SHUT UP” she hissed, ferociously, her face deformed in the flashing red light. “I don’t care if I have to turn one of your legs into a bloody pulp, I fucking will if you don’t keep quiet and listen. Am-I-Clear?”

There was something in her eyes that made her look feral, a mixture of terror and harshness that had usually no place in the quiet, demurred girl he used to know . It took only a glance to her face to make him gulp down whatever insult was about to spurt out. “Crystal, ma’am.”

Hana only nodded, pointing the door with the rifle “Well then, hands up Blue Leader, and move. We need your Y-Wing right now.”

She didn’t had to repeat herself – the man followed her indications immediately, surprisingly docile.

“You will bring me on their cruiser-don’t you dare to stop”, she commanded, pushing the blaster barrel between his shoulder blades “If they really cut off all communications, then they also anticipated whatever move I can make here. We need to go down to the source of the problem.”

Jonah, on the other side of the long barrel, was fuming. “Wha…Are you trying to make us killed? If they really know we’re here, boarding the Executioner is a suicide!”

“And what do you think, that staying on a dead ship that is drifting through space, waiting to be boarded, will safe you miserable life?”, she snarled. At the same moment, a security office who shouted the alt was targeted with a very well-directed warning shot that had him jump quickly behind a blast-proof door.

Jonah didn't try to rebel when he was pushed in the elevator, choosing to just set on deadly staring while pushing the hangar button without even being asked to.

“What do you think you'll do if I bring you there?”

She swallowed anxiously, forcing her heartbeat to slow down.

“Rey doesn't know they're waiting for them – we must communicate or they will all be killed. Or worse.”

“And you think you can accomplish that all alone?” he sneered.

She raised her blaster enough to have him take a good look down the barrel; her mouth was set on a straight line that resembled a couple of very different general she had been very close to.

“No, I think I need a partner. But believe me, I can devise a plan even with just cannon fodder.” her smile, at that moment, would have made any First Order instructor very proud, even if her hands were shaking slightly. “That's your choice which one to be.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look who's not dead - I have no excuses.


End file.
